A cardinal rushes into the Pope's quarters. "Your Holiness," he says. "I've got some good news and some bad news!"
"First tell me the good news."
"Your Holiness, Jesus Christ has returned to Earth--and he's on the phone and wants to talk to you!"
"That's great news!" exclaims the Pope. "What could possibly be the bad news?"
"He's calling from Salt Lake City."
Apropos of my recently completed trip....