Friday, June 17, 2011

8 Weeks

My skiing accident was eight weeks ago today. When I think back to what shape I was in on that afternoon and the next morning, I can recognize the tremendous progress I've made towards walking again--I can hobble around the house without crutches if I need to, and that's a big deal. On the other hand, I still can't even move my left leg forward more than two inches, I can't bend my left knee beyond maybe 15 degrees, and I can't lift my left leg at all. I can't even make it budge to pretend like it's going to lift.

The glass is filling, but it's nowhere near half full.

Yesterday was the first full day I went without a pain pill, and I survived. I took one at about 10 pm on Wednesday night, and none at all yesterday. But I couldn't sleep. My leg didn't hurt, but my entire body felt "uncomfortable", I felt tired but not tired enough, and I couldn't sleep. I also had other stuff on my mind. I watched an import movie I picked up at Blockbuster, and while it made me sad, it wasn't enough to put me to sleep, even though it ended after midnight. So at about 4 (or so said the clock) I got up and took the pill, and that seemed to be enough to let me sleep for over 4 hours. And I had another one of my seemingly very long, very elaborate, vivid dreams, although such dreams are not listed on the list of side effects.

I hope I'll be tired enough tonight not to need a pill to get to sleep. Oxycodone is very addictive, and I know someone who died from an overdose of it. I'm very conscious of not taking too much, and hope that last night isn't a sign that I'm becoming dependent on it (even though I've been taking less and less).

Physical therapy starts this coming Wednesday. I'll be able to drive myself there; it takes me a couple minutes to wriggle my way into the car, but once I'm there, I'm ok for short distances. It's uncomfortable, but not unsafe. I limit myself to short distances, with little traffic, perhaps once a day max, and that shouldn't be putting anyone at risk. I'm glad not to have to depend so much on asking others for rides or assistance now; while people say they don't mind, and they probably don't, I want to keep it that way and not overstay my welcome, as it were. I say that as I'm expecting a former student to arrive in about an hour to clean out my hot tub, which has been drained for months. My orthopedic doctor said a hot tub would be good for me

And I stopped typing there because the doorbell rang! OK, he's significantly early, but to his credit he did give an "ish" time, and he said he came early because he had to go to work today four hours earlier than he thought. Fortunately he didn't interrupt anything important on my busy social calendar!! He's out there now, taking care of the tub. There's no way he'll finish before he has to go to work, but he said he'll be back before my physical therapy starts on Wednesday so I'll have the tub available. Nice kid. Good kid..

So, 8 weeks.

Update, 6 hours later: this just goes to show you how out of sorts I am. Today's Friday. 8 weeks will be tomorrow.


Ellen K said...

Good luck Darren. I know it has been a difficult period for you. Just do what the PT's say and they will help you. PS. You are wise to wean away from pain pills. I have heard horror stories as well. The docs wanted me to have some for my arm, but I stuck with tylenol. Less is more.

Darren said...

That pill I took at 4am was the last one I took, and I feel just like I did last night--"uncomfortable", and unable to sleep. I fear I'm becoming reliant on them, something I'll definitely address with the therapists next week (if they're knowledgeable about such things).

Ellen K said...

Just a suggestion, but you may want to seek a hypnotherapist. I have been able to control anxiety attacks using skills from a short period of hypnotherapy and a course in self-hypnosis.

Darren said...

Interesting idea. I taught myself self-hypnosis in high school, with some rather dramatic results.