Why Americans Eat Fast Food (aka Your Tax Dollars At Work)

I want to hope that IJR got suckered into quoting from an Onion story or something.

According to Independent Journal Review:

Quick question: Why do people buy “fast food”?

Go ahead, think it through a second time to make sure that you’re confident of your answer. We’ll give you all the time you need.

(pause)

And yes, you are correct. People buy fast food because it is food that comes to them fast.

That 1-minute consideration you just went through was also just recently investigated, researched, concluded upon, and then written about in a new report from the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Economic Research Service (The USDAERS). The USDAERS (pronounced Users) took 52 pages to come up with this conclusion:

People buy fast food because it is food that comes to them fast...

They also used formulas like this:

 (But only with

as the cumulative distribution function for the standard normal distribution). Of course, you would assume that. Everyone would.

They also stated their data with neato-peato graphs like this...

You get the idea.

We need more government so even more such important topics can be researched.