Here's an essay, written in the style of a freshman essay, by a college professor. Read it and howl.
The topic? Compare and contrast the movies Curious George and Brokeback Mountain.
My favorite comment was this one, which had less to do with the essay but relates to what I've said before:
You forgot to start a sentence with "I feel that...." I keep telling my students that the brain has no nerve endings, so when they say they feel something, they're probably right, because they're certainly not thinking.